Under the table
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I agree with you. I know when I jerked off in front of an older waiter in an Indian restaurant, I shot out my sperm load with even more force. in my case some of it landed on top of the maroon table cloth! I apologized and he said 'it's fine", nodding in approval, so I just wiped my dick up with the part hanging near my lap. I left a $12 tip which was about twice as much as normal per amount spent.